F is for Jason (devil_of_punk) wrote,
F is for Jason


haha. i think what we did made me jealous. Only a little, first I had to know what you have I didnt have, what you do I couldnt do, and how does it last longer than I had.

And I dont want you back, just that feeling. And waiting is no longer an option. In the past waiting lead to a fling we had, then back to normal, then a fling yet again. Haha, and it has even been so long, its like we didnt even meet at all. I've changed so much, and maybe for the worst. Hell, you even stayed boring. Ive always learned to never change people. They come out annoying. As any other person would want to know, "do you think about me at all in your day-to-day life?" Doesnt matter how, Out of spite, or out of a liking, or maybe even neutral. But asking would seem I harbor some type of feeling, and it is far too embarrassing. Write these thoughts, (though bare with me they are just thoughts) is already embarrassing enough. But think of this, I will admit ti having somewhat of an ego. And, the countless people that I have been with really mean nothing to me. But someone how you stuck. I think it is because I never have real feelings for people. So a stupid girl that gave it up to the football player (That just wanted sex) for the first time. I am stuck, stuck and wondering. Could I be this great? My flaws are over-looked by so many people Except for you. For some reason, that and you as little as it is, matter to me. Lying before saying "This is it", or now telling the truth saying "This is it." I believe that what ever it is now? Yeah. This is it. Ive told some, things dont always have a fairy tale ending. Things cant have one, if they have already ended. This is all just a rambling thought at 5am. So dont jump to anything. I just havent had feeling for a person in almost 1 year.
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